Electricdaisy Productions :: Nikutai no Yume

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Song :: Yuudachi [ download ]
Artist :: Suga Shikao (Boogiepop Phantom OP)
Genre :: ...motown?
Comments :: The anime - I've seen to ep.4 - is Lain done better, supposedly the smartest show to come down the chute since Utena. The song is funky!catchy and American-inflected in a manner reminiscent of Cowboy Bebop. It's also hard to find.

Song :: Human World [ download ] [ lyrics ]
Artist :: Faye Wong (orig. Nakajima Miyuki)
Genre :: orchestrated pop ballad
Comments :: I've mentioned this often enough that I *have* to put it up, methinks... This is the "Julia for Rinoa" song, although you'd probably have to understand the lyrics to agree. The tune is Japanese enka; like most of mid-early Faye, it wouldn't sound out of place as a FF theme.

Last watched :: nada

Currently listening :: Alicia Keys, "Fallin'"

Currently playing :: not... at... all...

Currently reading :: Murakami Haruki, "Underground"; poking at Guy Gavriel Kay on the shelf


name :: Sabina

age :: hatachi ^_^

appearence :: [ natsuyasumi ] [ matsuri ] [ locker ]

sibling :: [ imouto-chan ]

domicile :: Montreal, where it snows in April, 16-yr-olds barhop and large bookstores carry manga in French

birthplace :: Shanghai, the city where they'd do anything (as opposed to Beijing where they'd say anything, and Canton where they'd eat anything ^.~)

alma mater :: McGill University

occupation :: RPG storyboarding, unpaid coding, website tweaking

indulgence :: novels, manga and anime, fanfiction written and read, MP3s, sleeping at odd hours, alcohol, mooching food, cooking

sign :: Pisces ascendant Venus + Metal Rooster = nasty chimera critter

keirsey :: iNTp (Engineer)

colour :: on me, lilac, violet, forest green and black; on others, whatever brings out the shade of their eyes and the highlights in their hair ^_^

perfume :: citrus / fruity floral (ex. Yves Rocher Orchidée)

flower :: intense, fragrant and seasonal (apple, lilac, magnolia, peony)

jewelry :: silver anklet

gem :: amethyst (birthstone), opal, moonstone, cat's-eye agate

season :: summer

animal :: Felis domesticus (a terrible misnomer). I live to be happily downtrodden by that privileged species :p

voted (by guy-pals) :: Washu

voted (by gal-pals) :: Crawford

guardian angel :: Tzaphkiel

anime series :: Berserk, CLAMP Campus Detectives, Card Captor Sakura, Cowboy Bebop, Escaflowne, Gundam Wing, Legend of Galactic Heroes, Rurouni Kenshin, Slayers, Shoujo Kakumei Utena, Trigun

manga series :: Angel Sanctuary, Basara, Five Star Stories, Fushigi Yuugi, Blade of the Immortal, Petshop of Horrors, Slam Dunk, X, Yami no Matsuei, Yuu Yuu Hakusho, Zetsuai/Bronze

ficcing series :: AS(?), FF7(and the rest?), FY, GW, Trigun(?), WK, YYH, Z/B

music :: Baby V.O.X., Bran Van 3000, Nick Cave, Cibo Matto, Leonard Cohen, DEEN, Melissa Etheridge, Fantastic Plastic Machine, Gackt, Garbage, Globe, Guniw Tools, Oliver Haze, Kanno Yoko, Laruku, Gigi Leung, Lili Fatale, Sarah McLachlan, S.E.S., the Tea Party, Teresa Teng, Two-Mix, Uematsu Nobuo, Utada Hikaru, Faye Wong, the Yellow Monkey and various singles 'n' soundtracks

books :: [ partial list ]

non-alcoholic :: bubble tea, Coca-Cola Classic, Brio (viva Italia!), hazelnut coffee, peach Snapple, chai latte, pink grapefruit juice, green tea absolutely anything

alcoholic :: rum-and-Coke, gin-and-tonic, Irish cream, dark sherry, warm sake, Alsacian rosé, Hungarian white, gold tequila, merlot, cassis in sparkling wine

happy :: to know that one is living a moment of intense perfection; the sensation of drowning in beauty. Also, getting a favorable blurb on your work from a writer you yourself respect *^_^*

sad :: that time is slipping through my fingers, that there is nothing I can do to stop it - and that perhaps it is my fault


ICQ :: 67820805

AIM :: WingPetronia


From a Japanese film called "Otogirisou" (St. John's Wort), scanned out of the FantAsia film festival booklet. The film was pretty run-of-the-mill, but the atmospherics of the house were wonderfully creepy. ^_^


03/09/01 - 13/09/01
27/08/01 - 02/09/01
19/08/01 - 25/08/01
09/08/01 - 19/08/01
24/07/01 - 07/08/01
16/07/01 - 23/07/01
09/07/01 - 15/07/01
01/07/01 - 07/07/01
21/06/01 - 30/06/01
19/05/01 - 19/06/01
22/02/01 - 17/05/01
17/12/00 - 14/02/01
07/11/00 - 16/12/00

Other Blogs

apocrypha of st.heero (Suze)
basic black (Priya)
bishounenink [ Joy | Tenshi ]
encircled (Charmian)
handbasket (Talya)
joliefolie (Lu-chan)
kelemenopy (Thea)
kudaranai (Kristin)
in the tradition of lunatics (Sarah)
signal 11 (Erin)
sisyphus descending (Soma)
velvetpaws (N-san)


Tuesday, October 2, 2001
04:13 p.m.

Another crop of assignments

I wrote the sockets program yesterday and have promised myself to write the random access file one this afternoon, to get it over with - the main attraction this week will be the texture generation project, I suspect. -_-; Of course I had to spend a couple of hours reading fashion magazines. Another binge fandom: the glossier the better. Ben Stiller only wears Prada and Chloe Sevigny mixes shimmer with her body lotion. The ballets russes look is back again (lucky lucky Tania, who did her winter shopping in Moscow this year). Dark lacy hose is back. Tall black boots are back. Profile of Condoleeza Rice - no matter how "together" you are, this woman will make you feel inadequate. Makeup trends are inconclusive. Hemlines are high. Profile of female Italian designer who lives in a castle and has five children, all gentian-blue-eyed Latino/as as gorgeous as models. Black *anything* is back, thank God (I came of fashion age smack-dab during the Minimalist '90s). The Pope is fast-tracking Mother Teresa to beatification. Another spate of wondering whether people who buy Manolo Blahniks have them insured. Annie Leibowitz is enormously busy. Annie Leibowitz... did the Harry Potter shoot. I will be greeting this film in a mood of cautious enthusiasm, which is saying a lot for me. My parents - my father especially - are puzzled by my worldview, methinks; he remembers being young and *knowing* they could all be heroes, and quite fails to understand how I could be a pessimist with the life I've led up to now. (There will never be peace in the Middle East, film adaptations of beloved novels always suck and it's all downhill after age 10.) But Annie makes the HP cast and set look very charming indeed, and for that I am glad.

It just piles up, this work, it just piles up. With the life I've led up to now, is it very bad of me to want to hop the freight train that runs behind my house - to where? ...Maybe this is why xemacs comes with a shrink AI. What a wonderful text editor.

Tuesday, October 2, 2001
08:28 a.m.

On Win2000 account

(Being the Generic Science Student Account, which I only use nowadays as an excuse to see my undressed Satsuki wallpaper. Note to self: ask student comrades about contravening the lock they've got on the FreeBSD accounts' desktop.)

Foggy this morning; not chilly, but humid and difficult to breathe. I am far more lucid than I usually am on Tuesdays - and wish I weren't, because the parent country has just declared war. Dear saints alive, the last Anglo-Afghan War wasn't exactly an unmitigated success for the forces of the Western world, y'know... never mind, I haven't the time to think on't. I'll social blog instead. ^^;

W2: Aoki-san, in point of fact, does a *stunning* impression of his putative hero Donnie Burns, complete with the teeth-snapping motion one of my dear friends once described as "Latin lover biting head off live chicken". As for why we used commonly to exchange ballroom dancing witticisms... well, that's a story and a half. I believe Kate Winslet and the soccer player Denilson were both involved.

(Snail mail to/from the 'States isn't working, by all accounts. Time to sign up with Paypal...)

Suze, etc.: ne, y'all should write some actual Angel Santuary smut, because there isn't. Not a-*tall*. It's something I'd like to see now out of pure scientific interest, so's I know if the broken lever lies with the fandom or the series. Double chocolate chip for yuri, methinks.

*looks at space occupied by One Piece manga on rental shelf*


Monday, October 1, 2001
12:18 a.m.

Though if you came down that path, you'd know already

The *blog* is a front-page rec on the new members' edition of Aestheticism.

(It was Jeanne being nice.) Nothing more could add to my o'erweening self-importance now. Except... does this mean I can spread vile canards about the Japanese yaoi fandom, and people will believe me? :P

Sunday, September 30, 2001
03:31 a.m.

Notes for the faithful readers, etc.

Tan-chan: too mentally wobbly to attempt webmail (will you *look* at that inbox?). Mooncalf's "Go Wyverns" is here. ...You'll have to google up a picture of these people, I suppose. Never mind the canon. The author will explain the clothing as she goes along. If you do not like this I will *eat* the Gazoo's business section.

Fell asleep in the process of dissecting the psychological progression of tBD's protagonists for above's benefit. The late autumn nights are getting chilly, but we lit candles that warmed the room with scent - an odd little Petshop in its own way, this place, always a warm haze of tea and flickering flame and animal patterchirping, dead roses in vases and friandises on gold-patterned china - and other people's quilts (not imported from Commie China once upon a time) always seem so heavy and warm to me... I dreamt about Schuldich. I *never* dream about him. It seemed so natural I have to wonder if writing this story isn't driving me a bit bonkers. I remember an intriguing scent to his hair, a heavy richness like burying one's nose in a cat's clean fur. His voice was so clear in my head when I woke up (alarm, tired, with great reluctance) that I could have taken dictation, had I only the energy. I didn't. I got up and came home and showered and performed mundane chores, and later in the afternoon drifted into some quality girls!alone time with my sister. Meaning that I painted her nails and talked about male vs. female circumcision - shoot me, this is our version of girltalk - and the doctrine of transubstantiation, and she tried to convince me to give her nephews. I hope she doesn't go spreading the Jesus=Pita meme around her school... ^^; Then we made soup, because we were hungry.

Sa-chan and Lu-chan's Express Lane Cream Curry Soup:

2 cans Campbell chicken noodle soup
2 cans 2% milk
2 medium-small potatoes, scrubbed and chopped with skin on
2 teaspoons white vermouth
handful of crumbled dried seaweed, any kind (even packaged seaweed snacks will do)
1/2 tablespoon curry powder
pepper to taste (you don't need more sodium in this, trust me)

Toss everything into the same pot, set on medium heat and keep stirring until the potato bits are edible - don't let the stuff boil. Serves two very hungry people with speedy metabolisms.

I pass on the recipe because soup is comforting. The world is becoming less and less so. In my java tutorial tome I ran across an implementation of historian Josephus's hot potato game, of all things. Not calculated to induce geopolitical optimism in yours truly. "Senator Flavius, how do you propose we deal with those suicidal crazies in the Middle East?" Two thousand years and only the explosives have improved. Oh, the humanity!

I'll just be over here listening to my Korean hip-hop. It's obviously done by the same five Swedish knob-twisters who produce 90% of the most prevalent American pop; there's nothing so comforting as a prepackaged product.

Friday, September 28, 2001
03:01 p.m.


Joy - happy birthday! (And Tenshi - omedetou for the job! ^_^v)

Relatively alive and awake today, although this week has drained most of my reserves. (My head is still unaccountably crammed with Korean girl idoru group bunnies. @_@ I've stopped questioning my sudden obsessions - there's usually some deep-seated issue at work that I'm only capable of pinpointing in retrospect - but still. You'd think I'd pick SES, as, y'know, they can actually sing.) Don't get me wrong, I still have piles of work, but we'll see if we can fit e-mail into the equation sometime during the weekend. Ai yai yai... energy level in despite, the prospect of heading out to 737 tonight is unaccountably tempting. R&B, and comfortable chairs. I'll even wear my sexy shoes, as long as I don't actually have to dance. ^_^;

Charmian: Manji has got to top the list of People Who Should Never *Ever* Be Forced Into A School Uniform. ^^; BotI itself was a live-action series in Japan, actually, although as far as I can tell they just took the early part of the story and ran with it in another direction. So was GTO - Great Teacher Onizuka - and Hana Yori Dango's been made into movies, TV series in other Asian countries. It's by no means an uncommon vector for a popular series to take.

As for the other point, a lot of the grittier/more explicit yaoi doesn't map onto shoujo so much as it maps onto ladies' comics, destined for an older audience and often quite exploitative, even trashy (to these eyes anyway - I don't like most yaoi manga). OTOH I suspect the classic high-dorama heavy-angst shounen-ai developed partly as a counter to the saccharineness of het shoujo - to provide a forum for telling these stories that would be too harsh (too unrealistic?) to depict as occuring between a teenaged boy and girl. So perhaps it's part of the genre's raison d'etre.

As for "het yaoi", I'd have to say that Anotsu/Makie comes pretty close. :P Makie is a good candidate for "female bishounen" in her own right; like all the other girl!bishes I can think of, the vast majority of her problems stem from the fact that she *is* a girl. ^^;

Thursday, September 27, 2001
05:33 p.m.

In case you were wondering

The blog now looks great in Netscape 4.76 / Linux freeBSD @ >1024x468 and a 20" screen. It almost certainly looks like crap on any other setup, but hey. I'm on the box I'm on the box I'm on, y'know? They killed my WinNT account for this semester, and I'm tired of the miniaturized illegibility. I'll try hand-coding the thing from scratch next layout and see whether a compromise can be reached.

My head cold has left my sinuses and taken up residence in my windpipe, as per usual. Every virus I've caught for the last seven godforsaken years has done the exact same tiresome thing. >_<

What is *wrong* with the time stamp on the last entry?

Thursday, September 27, 2001
12:31 p.m.

Oh, never mind

The shell will do it for me, I see. If that indeed is the solution. Dash it all, I wish Merrett wouldn't be *cryptic*. I thought the entire point of the language was that it was platform-independent. -_-;

Kat: have I ever gotten around to thanking you for doing these occasional HPfic recs? ^_^ I haven't the endurance to sieve through the stuff myself. It's a binge fandom: I'll only touch it every two months or so, but when I do there had better be at least three hours' reading worth of text file before mine eyes. Preferably five to eight. ^^; Thank god for slash's propensity toward novel-length works, really. OTOH I don't *want* it to be a slash fandom, I want it to be a yaoi fandom. I've been waiting for about a year and a half for the Japanese fen to get through PoA, and my patience is only now beginning to pay off... XD

I'm on a Korean hip-hop kick, it seems. It happens every once in a while. It was Arabic raï before this, and Hindi techno before that, and Canto-pop and Greek bouzouki... a stress reaction, essentially. I go looking for music that has a nice endorphin-inducing beat - maybe it reminds me subconsciously of sex or my mother's heartbeat or something, I dunno - and is sung in a language I don't understand, so I can put it on while I work and not be distracted by the lyrics. They're probably inane anyway; at least, all the English referents of this type of music have inane lyrics.[NB1] Suffice it to say, pop acts that mix up 'to lay' and 'to lie' are a pet peeve of mine... I suppose that Jpop/Jrock is the ultimate example of this tendency of mine, notwithstanding that I understand Japanese lyrics now. Except when I actively tune them out, of course. ^_^;

[NB1: OTOH, Mainstream C-pop often has quite literate lyrics. Probably something to do with the structure of the tongue itself - "vocab" words in Chinese aren't any longer or harder to rhyme than common ones. So perhaps my Korean R&B honeys are trying to convey something more sophisticated than "baby wanna get down with you". Who's to say? And if you *are* Korean and know for a fact that they're not, don't disillusion me. Please. ^^; I'm incapable of picture-reading manga - I just end up learning the language - but I have been known to map significance of my own creation onto the emotion in the voices of my exotic popstars. It wouldn't be nice to ruin my fun.]

Wednesday, September 26, 2001
06:44 p.m.


Actual quote from 420 (Files and Databases) assignment:

"Use the merge algorithm discussed in class [ed. note: this is a simple bit of logic involving lexicographic string compare that's USELESS unless the input is in alphabetical order]. The two input files are not necessarily sorted. How would you sort them without writing a program or program code?"

...Geez, sir, no problem - I guess I'll just call soundOfOneHandClapping() in java.lang.Object.ZenKoan to do the work for me. >_< I may not kill the Bouddha if this goes on, but if I meet my professor on the road he should watch his back.

Ate dinner last night courtesy of M$. Recruitment drive is subdued compared to last year - more hiring freezes, less funky gizmo giveaways - but The Man is still good to hit up for a few slices of pizza. (Even if it was mushroom/onion/olive pizza. Man, I didn't know that was a flavour.) Osoroshikatta kedo... I always get this feeling that I'm lucky to leave the room without having had Windows installed in my brain. ^^; M$ employees may speak and walk normally, but something about the eyes I tell you...

And hey, I got a sparkly red twister bracelet from Capital One! (I lost the one from the job fair last year.) And a chapstick and a mousepad, and a battery-powered miniature fan. Still, last year the dotcoms were handing out t-shirts in one's requested size. X_x

On the non-scholastic front, I've been infected by a Baby V.O.X. yurific virusbunny. If you have no idea what I'm talking about (who, rather), be glad. I think someone put crack in the water supply.

Tuesday, September 25, 2001
12:32 a.m.

Interstitial websurfing

(Numerical computing assignment on IEEE floating-point standard. Frustration - I should know this by heart. Why don't I know this by heart already?)

Finally figured out the deal behind the search hits I thought I was getting for Basara pr0n (not as bizarre as some of the rapefic requests, I warrant you): they're looking for the new Porno Graffiti single. Inefficiently. -_-; Of course, for all I know the song really *is* about the same Ageha. PoruGura just isn't returning my calls today for some reason, but weirder inspirations there have been. Gackt says "Asrun Dream" is about Banana Fish. Banana Fish, for cripes' sake...

Then again, Gackt also says he's 400-something years old. *shrug*

Monday, September 24, 2001
04:16 p.m.


I have a head cold. In retrospect, the cold shower after the swim on Friday was probably a bad idea... I also had the rambling-est entry, all about Gackt's lyrics and Keats' narrative failings, but that's gone. Eaten by the Ctrl-C key. Don't expect too much from me this week, comrades: work is piling up, and with them my usual symptoms of stress. Marathoning Eroica fic, for instance. Does anyone else have binge fandoms, or is this my personal peculiarity?

And now to class... to class... to class...

Saturday, September 22, 2001
12:21 a.m.

*Checks date above*

Eight or nine days to organize an all-star three-continent telethon? Must've set a record.

...No no, I won't be sarky, really. I remember writing a week ago that we all do what we can, and it's good (if surreal) to see Hollywoodians set aside their egos to take donation calls. But still - *telethon*, y'know?...

Suze/Jae: sorry, it was a throwaway reference to a pet theory that several of my friends have been treated to ad nauseam. ^^; I mean: weblogs that exist in order to disseminate writing to prospective readers. Said writing differs in genre from entry to entry and log to log, of course - personal essay, travelogue, humor, information, editorial, polemic (rant), review, fiction draft, even formal correspondence (which 'Mancy does often I find). What all these formats share is an intent to convey ideas to the reader, who may not necessarily be anyone the writer knows. I think of a weblog as one's personal column in one's personal newpaper: you get a helluva lot of leverage, but it's still a newpaper column, not a diary. I have nothing *against* people using their weblog as a personal diary ("today I went with Jane to the Kino and bought X-11 and HanaKimi 3-5"), let alone a bulletin board for personal friends ("Jeff-niichan, I sent you email so check your email!"): it's just that those weblogs have value and meaning to their owners, not to me. ^^; I'm too anti-social to care about the minutiae of your existence if I don't actually *know* you. I'm not fond either of blogs that are nothing but link-chasing ("check "this" out, it's pretty cool") - I waste quite enough time surfing on my own, thanks.

Now, before I'm forced to break out the asbestos suit, I have to point out that I don't mean you shouldn't talk about your life on your own weblog. What I mean is, if you're going to post it up on the Internet for random strangers to see instead of taking it down in an attractive paper notebook to keep in your drawer or pass around to your friends in class, then I believe you should make the effort to interest said random strangers. Tell it, IOW, don't just set it down. Diaries can be literary endeavours too. (Go back a century or two, they were highly popular literary endeavours.) Be opinionated; be clever; be stylish, be bitchy, do a song-and-dance. Tell it like you'd tell a story, if you have to, write it like you'd write fanfic - I promise you it's good practice. I'm generous anyway. I don't hold my favorite columnists to high literary standards all the time, only some of the time. :P

And once again for good measure, *my* opinion means jackshit in the view of the weblogging world at large, so I'm not taking the stance of someone who Knows What The Real Deal Is (tm). What you do with your pitas/lj/blogger account is your own merry business. I do, however, only have so much time to read in *my* life. (Needless to say, a bit of that time is spent every day or two with Suze and Jae, because they *are* worth it. ^_^)

(You see that?... :P I did warn you it was a pet theory.)

Thursday, September 20, 2001
08:57 p.m.

I see

Xoom/NBCi has finally died. W00t! ^_^v

...Before you wonder at the strangeness of my response, I must point out that they froze my accounts for about four months while their free webhosting service languished away. Four months of not even being able to remove the webring code so I could shift my Z/B translations to kekkai. At least now the mess is clear gone. I'll have to patch up a page as fast as possible, of course - today is best - because although I *like* to think of #1 Crush as an easily-blown-off project the fact remains that it's the only site of mine that offers an honest-to-goodness public service. During my infrequent episodes of world-class omphalos-gazing I sometimes remember how *sucky* my quickie second-hand translations are (I did them a rented Taiwanese tankoubon a night), with a twinge of guilt for the masses who depend on them for their idea of the characters... ^^;

Updated the Favorite Books list. Has anyone read the Angélique books by Anne Golon, btw? Anyone? Please say yes... ^^;

Thursday, September 20, 2001
01:42 a.m.

One of these days

I shall update my Well-Loved Books list, and tell you about my professors. But not today. ^^;

(Utterly irrelevant announcement: xemacs is *really* cool...)

Today I felt "creative", in a undirected, non-ficcing, non-series-specific sort of way. It's a kind of energy, like slowly being filled from the soles up with Alka-Setzer. It began, IIRC, with a conversation I had with myself regarding Camui Gackt - something along the lines of, I'm less a *fan* of Gackt per se than I am glad of the fact of his existence, because he is the materialization of a certain... what? An original character I would have to write otherwise, I suspect. I relate to Gackt as I would to one of my OCs, or at any rate someone's OC. Probably *his*. And so forth with the semantics and the metaphysics...

So I fizzled and popped for a while, then hunkered down to make a drawing - the subject eventually ended up looking very much like a teenaged Rufus Shinra, if Rufus Shinra lived in Gundam Wing instead of Final Fantasy. That makes *three* sketches now I'm putting off inking. The one today, the PSoH one that I'm trying not to think about because it needs traditional-media paints to come into its own, and the Kuja one. The Kuja one has *logistic* problems. My default drawing style looks rather like WK-anime, and I can't figure out for the life of me how to get his... pants... to stay on. -_-; They just won't, not on anyone with remotely boyish hips, not the way the straps are configured. (Yes, I'm one of those people who draw the clothes on *over*. It's the best way to keep anatomical issues from coming back to haunt you - snicker again and I pound.) I suspect the next time I try to tweak that sketch I shall have to throw up my hands and take it as an article of faith that he's got surgical tape somewhere under there.

If my sister remembers I have this picture gathering dust I am dead. Shinchau. Gone. I haven't seen her clay Kuja voodoo-worship doll lying around lately, but that doesn't mean I'm any more reassured.

Wednesday, September 19, 2001
02:25 a.m.

O-naka ga... d'oh. :/

Forget weight. Should've known that as soon as I got back to school I'd be attempting to live on pint o' coffee&cream a day and precious little else... Stomach is picketing and slinging slogans. I re-read my own fics, or at any rate those I like. I'm encouraged by the fact that "Dawn" doesn't appear to suck anymore, now that I've completely forgotten that I was the one to write it. The Rude part needs work, but that's easily handled in a weekend. VoT always gives me a scared-adrenalin rush instead of the kind I was aiming for. MitM is *still* the best one - sad, because it's nearly two years old. OTOH it's been two years of tweaking those twelve measly pages semesterly, so there *can't* be much humanly wrong with it now. ^^; All I found this time around was an iffy verb tense, which I shall be modifying.

Anal-retentive, moi? Surely you jest.

Although - MitM, Ofuro, tLoN - reading those stories I'm bowled over by how *well* I knew Fushigi Yuugi. The entire series forward and backward, timeline, OAVs, novels, minor references, by heart. FY and Slam Dunk are, I think, the *only* series I ever knew that thoroughly. ...Well, and Angel Sanctuary. That's it. I never watched the YuuYuu TV series; I never finished the RK manga. I don't understand GW well enough, and there are parts of the WK continuity I honestly don't care to know. I'm fuzzy on the details now - with *my* memory, ha - but I know it made a difference in the writing, that purehearted obsessive immersion. It makes a difference now. I can still channel a damned good Hongou Yui; ask me if I have the same certainty regarding Saitou Hajime.

I *like* the ending to tBD. Damned. There's a number of syntactic clichés, I suspect, but behold my level of caring asymptotically going to zero. Lorraine said it was... inconclusive... but IMO only in the sense that IWTV is. Come to think of it, a most apposite comparison.

Will be attempting a bit of an experiment. Don't know if it means I'll stop blogging. What it will hopefully see is more work from me, and less slacking. Dieu, I hate the slacker me.

Tuesday, September 18, 2001
01:29 p.m.

Too much coffee for moi

Spent the entire day skipping class to read Neil Gaiman's weblog (which doesn't seem to be crashing my browser anymore, or at any rate this browser).

...Crap. I should really stop doing this.

(OTOH, have I mentioned my theory yet re how the only weblogs worth reading are the ones written with the purpose of being read in mind? No? How about the fact that after Murakami traumatized me into aborting my read-a-thon yesterday, I instead started an Anita Blake novel, thus proving that I have no clue what sunny escapism in literature means even when I'm looking for it?


How about the fact that an editorialist in my Saturday Gazette referred to bin Laden as "girlishly pretty despite the beard"?

...Yeah, I'll go to class. Geez.)

Monday, September 17, 2001
11:39 p.m.

Daily grind, she repeats like a mantra

Tin (re the missing entry, before I get derailed again by international crisis, and hoping you're still checking back here): I had no idea you knew of me at all. ^^; I'm on KFFDisc, so I've read a few of your fics as they came through, but your ficlog is the first time I've encountered your work for other series. (The current version of Vanity Press is the first that didn't break my IE5@home. ^^;;;) I really, really *do* like "Violet", BTW. PSoH-the-series is brimming with potential - but much like Evangelion or Lain, parts of the ending puzzle me terribly. I'm close to saying: Akino-sensei contradicted herself outright, murdered the logic of her series for an arresting image, a haunting moral. But where does that leave me if I want to write for't?

(With bunnies, of course. An easy but frightfully obscure one re post-series Chris, a second one re D's father and the FBI man that I keep locked away in the back - it's got red eyes and keeps on making a break for the Pocky tin - a third, the literary one, involving Stockton and Coleridge, that's tempting from an artistic POV but will require building from the ground up. Compelling but headachy prospects, on the whole.)

I *did* watch the PSoH anime over the weekend. The primary response ran something like *squawk* "Vash and Legato!" *dies*. ^^; The secondary response... the actual animation itself was very nice, and a real eye had been kept on the atmospherics and pacing (the dreamy sense of buildup wasn't the mangaka). "Daughter" and "Dual" were cut down somewhat; "Delicious" and "Despair" were expanded. Three extra notches of pwetty went into the character designs, to compensate for the three notches of shoujo-tease taken out (really!). The second dubbed tape actually didn't suck. Partly, of course, because a story like "Dual" makes that much more sense in English, period. I wish they hadn't cut it. (Fine, so it wasn't "Wag The Dog", but allow me to marvel momentarily at the novelty of a manga yomikiri on *American politics* that didn't feel glaringly false right off the bat, supernatural element and all. I live in Canada, and most people I know can't make heads or tails of the U.S. system. I wonder if Akino habitually reads Washington Post columnists. Wait - marvel #2. She must've written this *before* Dubya...)

Believe it or not, I had several other cultural items to review besides the PSoH anime, but I seem to have run out of time (must be up at 8 tomorrow). I will just make *one* very brief note: Murakami Haruki's "Underground", though excellent in every other respect, is the worst possible book to read if you're trying to take your mind off current events on this continent. Yes, that *was* Sabina huddled in her bucket seat on the métro tonight, glancing about nervously for suspicious-seeming plastic bags...

Sunday, September 16, 2001
04:14 a.m.

Notes on my so-called life

Thursday evening was the opening of the Chinese Lantern Festival at the Botanical Garden, which did more than anything else these last few days to snap me back to a state of normality. Nothing like escaping into Fushigi_Yuugi_World, I suppose... It's a little-known fact that Shanghai is Montreal's sister city. The Chinese Garden was essentially built there and shipped over in pieces to be reassembled, thanks to le maire Bourque's term as administrator of the BG. The lanterns come from Shanghai too. Tania took piccies compulsively - about three rolls' worth - but as she used flash I don't know how they'll turn out (to capture the effect of the lanterns properly you'd normally need to set the shutter speed real slow on a 133t camera with the flash off and hope for the best). I'm putting up a photo of last year's display on the sidebar, though, while waiting for this year's to develop. I am - to quote my other friend - the larger blur. ^^; The smaller one is the sororial entity, who the usual suspects seem to have decided will constitute Nagi in the mad WK semi-LARP that serves us as a friendship.

...Don't ask, you'd probably not like the answer.

(The other photo is of historical interest: my school locker three years ago. Not all the pictures were mine. The non-anime ones belonged to my lockermate, who felt threatened enough by my incursion into our shared visual space that she was impelled to put up her own. She was a childhood Maison Ikkoku fan, but I'm afraid that the trauma of my o'erweening enthusiasm quite turned her off the genre. XD)

Thursday night I got around ten hours of blissful sleep, and dreamt stories. I don't often remember stories from my dreams anymore, not like I used to... I wake up too fast with too many sounds clawing for my attention, my time constrained, gravity reasserting itself on the memories of the previous day. That's when my dreams aren't simply the minutes of my mind's nightly cataloguing of anxiety. But Aurora d'Neviene came to me on Friday morning, glorious in a grey riding dress and ridiculously feathery wide-brimmed hat, and I woke up smiling, thinking that she wanted to be written, how nice.

And then I went to class and was assigned an essay. X_X

Friday afternoon I played badminton and basketball, being in poor shape and in sore need of a workout. I am saved, however, from worrying about my weight by my parents, who have been worrying about my weight with such intensity these past few days that it's frankly funny. The night following the WTC falling down my father had nightmares - about me being fat. (I suspect they also worry over my sexual orientation - they're too embarrassed to ask me outright - but I'll have to save that story for when I can tell it properly. ^^;)

Like others, I've been doing a quiet bit of writing on the side. I finished the two-page ending scene of tBD, just now (don't get too excited, there's still a big chunk missing out of the middle). I can't post it here, for obvious reasons, but I think it turned out well. In fact it had better, considering how long I've had every particular thereof cinematographically imprinted in my synapses. (You Know Your Ethics Are Questionable When #47: the doctors at Rosenkreuz think you're a heartless bastard...) I want this to be done for Tan-chan's birthday, or at the very least Lorraine's. Knowing how I fail at deadlines and all. ^^;

Friday, September 14, 2001
02:56 p.m.

Et la vie...

I archived. If you want to hear me being depressing you can go read *that*, but I doubt anyone will. I'll update on my life and social blog once I get back from my badminton appointment, which is *now*. ^_^;;;

(Personal WTC disaster bilan: my sites are down. My friends have had their lives disrupted. The signing of my profit-sharing agreement has been delayed. I have an essay to write on the events of the past week - in Japanese. >_< All in all it's not so bad, but I've actually been *more* affected than I thought I'd be at first. I didn't think I'd be affected at all, except psychologically. Urk.)